I made a mistake.

I'm usually the first to be honest when I've messed up. And I have just realized, I've done some wrong.    And hopefully after reading this you won't make the same mistake. See I really liked this guy a long time ago. And long story short it didn't work out in the way I wanted it to. A few years later I heard he said some pretty bad things about me. So from that point on I didn't trust him. And honestly I don't blame myself, I was hurt and needed my guard up for my own good. I find that I always have my heart out there for anyone to stomp on, so every once in awhile I need to protect myself. Then in the last few years we've seen each other around. And it's not like I've been too cold, but I haven't always been the friendliest of friends. The first time I saw him, I practically blew him off. The next few times I said hi. And in the last year there was a few month period where I really really tried. At first I was afraid to be friendly but within a few weeks I noticed he was different. Over the time period I've known him he has always been polite and kind to your face. But that's to your face not only that but he was a bit of a player. This year he's changed, he's devoted his heart to the Lord and within the first night that I saw him I knew something was different. He cared about those around him, more than I've seen anyone care about others around them before. He became a complete lover to all. He's positive and kind, all of the time. And at one point this year I decided that I didn't feel like pursuing the friendship. I couldn't tell whether he was being friendly because he cared about the friendship or if he was being friendly because that's how he was supposed to act. At that point in time I made the biggest mistake. I knew that he had changed but still didn't trust him. I was afraid of being vulnerable because I always am. What I have missed out on now, is someone who wanted to be a caring friend. I thought I was making the best decision for myself. I thought that I was doing what was needed of me. But I was wrong, I thought I saw the Lord's plans through but I didn't. I don't want any of you to miss these opportunities. So honestly, be open to those around you. Be willing to trust even if you're afraid you'll be hurt. I would rather people hurt me day in and day out, than knowing I didn't try. Knowing that I might have missed an opportunity. A few months ago I thought I knew what they Lord wanted me to do in the situation. But going on with my own life and not paying attention to others is never part of the Lord's plan. I was friendly but I didn't let him in. And I really hope it isn't too late. I hope I get another try. We all need more positive and bright people around us. So now I know the Lord wants me to try and make a friendship grow. I don't know how I'll get there but I trust the Lord to guide me all the way. And I hope you do the same, don't cut others out of your life if they are only trying to help you become more fruitful. So here's to going out of our comfort zone's, here's to trusting the Lord, here's to being more vulnerable than we'd like. Sometimes we make mistakes, and hopefully the people around us will give us a second chance.

Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald- Summertime